Does love mean having total compatibility, always?

Love Compatabilty

Love Compatabilty

One of my friends and I were sitting in the last row of the bus while returning from office. We were definitely very good friends but never shared our personal matters. We just started with our usual conversation and ran through the topic of my interest in writing. She happened to share some messages that a guy was sending her. I knew they both were friends. The messages were very romantic and no wonder he is a good writer. I liked his poetry but I didn’t know how to react. Since she seemed to be positive I gave my normal response that her friend is a good writer or poet. Since then she started sharing about her friendship with that guy.

One day she simply said I wonder if he likes me the same way. I didn’t know what she meant by that, but I knew one thing, they liked each other well but did not express it yet.

And then she continued telling, “I went out against my principles for a dinner with him. We hardly spoke to each other. When I picked some topic, he did not make any comments or did not share his views but started with different topic. Somehow I felt he was indifferent towards me. At the end, he did not even ask if I need a drop though it was late in the night. He left me alone and made me feel in-secured.”

I am not the right one to judge as even now I know only side of the story. One thing I know they are still together.

The truth behind love vs compatibility in my words would be- no one said it would be easy, even when you try to step into your partners shoes, the decision which you make may not sound correct for your partner. But one good thing here, you need not have same answer or opinion always.  In reality, your mind can not be read by your partner like pre-written lyrics of love song, it involves loads of decision making. Also you both are NOT brought up under same roof. You have two different life stories having different characters and experiences, its fair if you lack compatibility to some extent.

In this world where men and women are competing equally, women are mostly left with tougher choices. (May be even men, in some cases.) So if partners have two different decisions for a situation, that is not a problem but there is a problem if you cannot find love between each other though you are not like minded.  Cribbing and criticising won’t help.  If you love your partner you will put extra efforts to understand. And if your partner loves you it will be recognized (at some point of time). Your problem doesn’t sound interesting to others as they already knew and have one. By the way, don’t use others brains to know your compatibility as your heart already knows it right.

 

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Its not about "Coin-Richness"

How rich you feel today?

It's not about "Coin-Richness"

It’s not about “Coin-Richness”

Richness of life for me is how well we are celebrating our lives. It comes out of happiness. Of course, everybody has their own opinion about it. Whatever be it; brings great difference to that moment in life and you feel very special about yourselves either by offering or by attaining love of your dear ones.

Yes, I ‘m referring to that moment when you feel instant happy receiving a surprise from your dear one, that small compliment about your looks by your partner, that moment when he shows little concern for you not just when you both are together but also in front of your friends and relatives, that moment when silence speaks and seals the distance between you and your dear friend, that moment when you are remembered by your small niece, that moment when you get to meet your dear friend after a long time, that moment when you jump on road with your iPod listening to your favourite song, that moment you post your blog as a part of DPChallenege, that moment when you prepare complete meal for your mother and see the happiness in her eyes…..and many more. These are THE small moments to cherish as NO ONE can live as much as you can during these times.

How many such incidents did you offer to your dear ones today and how many did you enjoy?
At first let me recall, when my partner thanked me for the early breakfast, a lovely call from my mom, urgent call from my niece – saying she is missing me so much, shhhh.. surprise for my partner a week after for our third month wedding anniversary, I enjoyed new release by Shankar Tucker (I have to dedicate a whole blog section about how mad m about ST Sir and his team), I secretly enjoyed a tea with biscuits this morning, met Maddy last weekend visited her town.
Very often it happens we expect small things, things which can’t be asked but can be expected, mostly inexpensive, a small gesture or token of affection which gives immense satisfaction. And if more such incidents fill our lives, it becomes more interesting and enriching.

Remember to make your dear ones feel special, as if not you non one else can.

This thought of blog was triggered after listening to Jack Jhonson’s – wasting time. And I owe him a big thanks esp. for these wonderful lines:

“Oh but everybody thinks
That everybody knows
About everybody else
Nobody knows
Anything about themselves
Cause their all worried about everybody else”
Have a R.I.C.H Day!

Everyone is special in their own way…

Recently I happened to check with people and browse over internet on different opinions about the statement; ‘Everyone is special in their own way’. Some people say; what makes you stand out in crowd is what makes you special. Some think, every person has a good virtue which makes him special. Few think being famous is what makes them special. Few state, it’s nothing to do with others opinion it all starts from ones thinking about own-self.

Well, I want to redefine the same statement in my own way – The moment you realize everyone around you is special in their own way is when you truly become special (to yourself).

Now that I truly know what makes me special I want to share with you all three Mantra’s to feel yourself special in this world. I happened to discover this, while talking to one of my grandfathers during my recent journey to home town.

He said Be Simple and Be Happy; one can be happy only when they do not compare themselves with others. But then how can one not compare with others?!? Well, do not Judge.

Here is a good & famous story, which I remember reading from Internet a long back. There was a man who had four sons. He wanted his sons to learn not to judge things too quickly. So he sent them each on a quest, in turn, to go and look at a pear tree that was a great distance away. The first son went in the
winter, the second in the spring, the third in summer, and the youngest son in the fall. When they had all gone and come back, he called them together to describe what they had seen. The first son said that the tree was ugly, bent, and twisted. The second son said no it was covered with green buds and full of promise. The third son disagreed; he said it was laden with blossoms that smelled so sweet and looked so beautiful, it was the most graceful thing he had ever seen. The last son disagreed with all of them; he said it was ripe and drooping with fruit, full of life and fulfillment. The man then explained to his sons that they were all right, because they had each seen but
only one season in the tree’s life. He told them that you cannot judge a tree, or a person, by only one season, and that the essence of who they are and the pleasure, joy, and love that come from that life can only be measured at the end, when all the seasons are up. If you give up when it’s winter, you will miss the promise of your spring, the beauty of your summer, fulfillment of your fall. Moral: Don’t let the pain of one season destroy the joy of all the rest. Don’t judge life by one difficult season.

If you think being rich makes you feel special, I would say being rich is same as possessing bag full of gold but rusted coins; until you can help the needy and bring smile on their faces.

If you believe to be famous makes you special; yes it does but how much time you spend with your dear ones?

As the singer Barney sang one his songs..

Your’ re special you’ re the only
one you’ re the only one like you
There isn’t another one in the whole wide world
Who can do the things you do

And it’s up to you what you want others to think about how you are special to them.

You are special as your friends depend on your advice.

You are special because you believe in your dreams.

You are special because you are here today.

And folks, one can’t be compared with another. Your ideas, your life, your background can never with anyone else.

It was rightly said by a famous actress Demi Lovato ; Do not judge me, you know my name, not my story.”